I had tried at least 4 times before the school had given me the admission. The anxiety of continuously checking the university website hoping for an admission letter was indescribable, at first, it was Mama’s fault I wasn’t admitted because she lacked money to sponsor my education, I gave up my dreams for school that year. And when she was finally financially able to sponsor my examinations came the continuous struggle to pass the cut off mark set by the university, as a boy without anyone, “no connection” I strived to get the merit list. After that entire struggle to enter the university, the fulfillment was never complete till I had a girlfriend. I smiled to myself. Sarah.. we started as study mates, for me it was a wonderful my girlfriend kept me at my books and not away from them. But of course we had our ‘leisure’, Weekends when it was not all books, I walked faster, trying not to think of what was to come, I didn’t want a “bulge” on my trousers.
I would have ignored the salute had the caller not be so close.
‘how fah na?’ I tried to cover my haste, taking his hands in mine in a handshake, it was a very dark scraggy boy in my class.
‘I de, where you de go?’
‘I wan go buy something?. Anything?’ I asked impatiently.
‘na dat assignment.. e b like say you de rush’ he must have noticed the unpleasant features on my face and signs saying I had no patience now for a chit-chat
‘na so’ I replied not wanting to appear rude‘
‘ok na, no wahala, later’ he smiled mischievously, perhaps he suspected that I was not going to a shop after all. We shook hands again and I walked on, ignoring the rumbling in my stomach reminding me that I had not eaten since the previous day. I had no money for food; we always had one due or another to pay for. I stopped by a shop and got an energy drink. I needed strength for Sarah.. The road was tarred but the tar was seen in patches, mud replaced the patches and the floor was littered with filth, I started towards Sarah’s street and was grateful it wasn’t so dirty, save for the water log and the erosion, ‘Even students environment the government cannot take care of’ I muttered angrily letting out a loud hiss as I walked carefully.
‘Nkem’ she embraced me as soon as she saw me standing at the door before letting me. Her unrefined igbo language, her pitched voice.. she pronounced the igbo as though she spoke English but the melody melted my heart, my heart pounded, how I love her, even the slightest thing about her excited me, I wanted to touch her shapely butt already, it was not too big and not small either, but I knew I couldn’t touch it in the ways I wanted just yet.. I dragged her back, and hugged her, her butt resting on my crotch, ahhhh, I wanted to tell her I couldn’t wait to lay her on the bed and do all I fantasied but,
‘I missed you Nkem’ was the only word that came out instead
‘Me too’ she replied shyly and dragged me to the bed. She made me sit and then started to talk on different things that had happened to her, moving from one story to another, never really completing any. She chattered excitedly not giving a break or asking any questions, as she loved to do. She just talked on, it gave me joy that she could only be like this with me; talk and be free, I said nothing, watching and enjoying the movement of her lips, she was beautiful. Her fair colored smooth silky skin; I wondered how I got so lucky,
‘Have you done G.S 101 assignments?’ she finally asked changing to another topic.
‘No ‘I replied pulling her into my arms, I could wait no longer, I took her lips in mine, my hands holding her head as though it were so delicate. She was the loveliest thing on earth; she returned my kisses shyly and eagerly.. I lay on the bed, dragging her with me, my hands moving to her butt, squeezing gently, kissing hungrily.. She moaned and started to mutter inaudible words, pressing her bust to my chest, all the while kissing me in her normal shy tender manner, perhaps that was what made the kiss the loveliest; the shy and tender way, she flinched suddenly, most likely she felt the big bulge on my trouser. I was grateful when I felt her petite hands start to caress me through my trouser, at first in careful examination and then passionately.. Her nipples were erect pointing to my chest and I knew she was not wearing a bra, I unbuttoned her shirt hastily, I couldn’t get enough.. taking each breast in my hands, they were lovely, like the rest of her body, not too big or small but very soft and smooth, I replaced my lips on the soft succulent breast and sucked.. her moans driving me to the peak, I sucked, licked, teased wanting to please her, my hand went lower still.. to the band of her skirt.. She let out a moan, ‘baby’ her voice excited me beyond reason, I started to drag down her skirt but her petite hands rested on mine stopping my actions. ‘Don’t go there, am not ready’ she blurted out, I stopped my actions instantly.
‘Am sorry.. I..’ I stammered, trying to get my senses back, my body covered in sweat, my need had made me forget my promise to my virgin girlfriend
‘It’s ok, just wait till I’m ready’ she said, I thought I saw fears in her eyes.
I said nothing more, merely rested her head on my chest, her protest had instantly killed whatever sexual drive I had, I just patted her head, we remained like that silently till she slept. My eyes ran through the room, it was big and spacious unlike the congested miniature room I share with two boys, the floor tiled in contrast to my carpeted one, she came from a wealthy home, she had it all, beauty, brains wealth and humility, she asked nothing from me, the least I could do was keep her virginity intact, then my eyes caught sight of the small book on the table, she had a pen in between pages, obvious she wanted to go back to the page demarcated by the pen, I gently detached myself from her and picked the book, curious to know the content, I replaced the pen with my middle finger and opened to the first page, It read, ‘My diary’ my first instinct was to drop the diary, it was private.. But just as soon I picked it up again and flipped to the second page, and in her diary, it read..
Written By Amaka