Sometimes, you don’t always realize when you’re�stuck in a bad relationship�with a terrible boyfriend. Most of the time, though, you�sort of�realize, but you don’t want to�admit it to yourself�or anyone you know, so you end up just making all of these�excuses for your boyfriend�whenever he does something awful. Yeah, these excuses are usually made to get your friends off your back, but they’re also made to help you feel better about the crappy way he’s treating you. And guess what?�They need to stop.
If you’ve found yourself in a relationship where you’re constantly making excuses�for your boyfriend’s behavior,�you’ve found yourself in the wrong relationship. Yes, there are plenty of times where your BF really�is�tired or cranky and that explains why he’s being a little snippy. Yes, sometimes he really�is�busy with work and that’s why he can’t be around as much as you’d like. But I’ve found that�most of the time, when these excuses are coming out of a girl’s mouth every other day,�her boyfriend just sucks�and she can’t admit it.
Here are the�10 excuses you need to stop making for your boyfriend.
He Has A Lot On His Mind, You Know?
You say this when:�He forgets your birthday or something equally as important.
It’s a common stereotype that dudes forget things like Valentine’s Day or anniversaries. And while it’s fine if it happens once in a while, it’s not okay for him to constantly forget something that’s really important to you. You boyfriend should never forget about your birthday! And if he does, you shouldn’t make an excuse for him! You should tell him what a sucky feeling it is, because it’s not cool.
I Made Him Really Mad. I Shouldn’t Have Said Anything.
You say this when:He abuses you, physically or emotionally.
It is NEVER your fault when a guy abuses you in some way. Even if you did do something to make him mad, he needs to learn how to deal with that anger and react better. Don’t ever make an excuse for a guy who hurts you physically – it doesn’t matter what you did wrong, that doesn’t warrant him hurting you. And he shouldn’t be emotionally abusing you either. Fights go two ways – never put the blame all on yourself.
He’s Just In A Bad Mood.
You say this when:�He’s rude to you or your friends or family members.
Like I said, sometimes people get in a bad mood and they’re a little bit more rude than normal. But if your boyfriend has made a habit of being nasty to you in front of others or just being mean to your friends or family members, that’s not okay. If he makes a mean comment to a friend, don’t brush it off with an excuse. Admit that he did something rude and ask him to apologize. He should be treating your friends with respect. He should also be treating you with respect in front of them (and always). Don’t pass off nastiness as just a bad mood.
I Feel Bad Breaking Up With Him.
You say this when:You want to dump him because you know he doesn’t treat you right, but something is holding you back.
Breakups are hard and I completely understand feeling a little guilty about breaking up with someone. But don’t use “I feel bad for him” as your excuse. If you’re unhappy, you need to get out of that relationship. Don’t stay with someone just to make them happy. Your happiness is important! Don’t let any guy manipulate you into being with them.
But When It’s Good, It’s Really Good.
You say this when:�Your friends are trying to convince you to break up with him.
Even bad relationships have their good moments. But if the terrible moments outweigh the happy ones, then something is wrong. Oftentimes in a bad relationship, you’ll experience moments of happiness that feel totally amazing – and then you’ll experience unhappy moments that are completely miserable. It’s up and down and that’s not good. It should be mostly up, with some lows. You know what I mean? Don’t let a few good times stand in the way of ending something that’s bad for you.
He Just Has A Flirty Personality. I Do Too, Sometimes.
You say this when:�He’s flirting with other girls right in front you.
I don’t care how “flirty” your boyfriend is naturally… he shouldn’t be blatantly trying to pick up another chick when you’re standing right there. He shouldn’t be doing it at all when he’s dating you! A little harmless flirting may be okay… if he’s outgoing, he might honestly not realize he’s doing it. But full-on flirting is a no-no. I know it’s embarrassing, but don’t make an excuse for him when he does something this shady.
He Just Doesn’t Like This Particular Thing, So…
You say this when:�He’s invited somewhere with you and he refuses to go because he just doesn’t feel like it.
One of my friends is dating a guy who will never go anywhere with her as her date. She constantly shows up to things alone and always says stuff that doesn’t make much sense like, “Well, he doesn’t really like BBQ food, so that’s why he didn’t come.” “Well, he hates wearing a suit, so I understand why he didn’t want to come to the wedding with me.” No. In a relationship, you should support your significant other and that sometimes means going to events you’re not particularly excited about to be by their side. If your BF can’t do this once in a while, he’s not a keeper.
It Was An Accident. He Feels Horrible.
You say this when:�He cheats on you.
I have actually heard girls say this and it blows my mind. When someone cheats on you, it’s not an accident. It didn’t “just happen.” It was a conscious choice to do something wrong that would hurt your significant other. Don’t make excuses for cheating! He did something wrong and he needs to own up to that. He might “feel horrible,” but that doesn’t make what he did any less wrong.
He’s Really Busy Right Now.
You say this when:�He won’t come hang out with you and your friends… again.
Your boyfriend doesn’t have to be best friends with your friends, but he does have to make an effort to at least be friendly with them. I’m not saying he’s obliged to come to every girl’s night, but he should accompany you to hang with them once in a while. If he refuses to hang out with your friends, don’t make an excuse about how “busy” he is. We’re all busy. We make time for the things we want to do and care about. The end.
But I Love Him.
You say this when:�Basically you can say this for anything.
I know you love him. I know you’ve never felt this way before. But loving someone doesn’t mean letting them walk all over you. Love isn’t about being treated badly. Just because you love him, that doesn’t mean he can do whatever he wants. Sometimes we can love someone who’s wrong for us. Being in love and being happy are actually two different things when it comes to a bad relationship. Please don’t let “love” stand in the way of your happiness.
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