As I stood by the roadside, I heard my phone ringing but I was more concerned with getting a taxi. I frowned as sweat dripped from my forehead rolling down my cheek, I cleaned it off with the back of my palm. Luckily, I sighted a yellow cab and I stretched out my hand waving at the driver.
“Where you dey go?” the taxi driver asked as he halted in front of me, with a heavy Yoruba accent.
“Falolu Street” I said adjusting the strap of my handbag.
“Madame na 500 naira”
“Haba! Oga na 300 I get o”
“Fine girl like you, you no hear say fuel scarce?”
“Oga abeg” I said smiling this time, “no be me make am scarce na”
“Oya enter make we dey go”
As I settled into the backseat of the cab, I heard my phone ring again. I fetched the phone and pressed on the receiver button.
“Amaka where you drop your phone” Uju asked as I sensed the annoyance in her tone
“Babe, sorry I was waiting for a cab then” I said smiling
“Ok, where are you heading to?” Tomorrow is Easter Thanksgiving service o
“I am going to see Roland, he asked me to come and make Afang soup for him” I lied
“Afang soup for kitchen or for him bed, eh Amaka”
I laughed, “Uju!! Stop na, I will be back early for service ”
“Ok, carry soup for plate come back abeg, and send my regard to your Roland” she said
Uju has always referred to him as ‘my Roland’, as she despised him for no major reason, except she felt he wasn’t good enough for me. Well, for as long as I remember none of my ex met Uju’s approval but nonetheless she was my best friend.
“Yes, I will. Is Jessica going with you”
“Yes, she sends her greetings”
“Ok, bye, talk to you later. I need to alight from the cab now” I said hanging up and paying the taxi man.
As I climbed the stairs, I called Roland, he picked after the third ring;
“Hello, are you back from work?” I said, my heart beat quickened.
“Yes I am, why are you asking?”
“I am at your door, please come and open up for me”
“What are you doing here, and why didn’t you inform me” he said sounding irritated or annoyed, I couldn’t place which.
“I came to see you” I said in a low tone, a bit embarrassed.
“Okay” he said, hanging up.
Standing at the door, I had my face to the ground, suddenly nervous.
As I heard the door open, I raised my head up, avoiding his eyes.
“Why didn’t you tell me you were coming” He asked folding his arms on his bare chest.
“I wanted to surprise you, and cook something for you for the Easter hols”
“Ok, come in” his mood suddenly better.
Stepping into the parlour, I saw his friend Jide lying on the cushion with his phone in his hand.
“Hello Jide”, I said
He turned, facing me and smiling; “Amaka, nice to see you” he said sitting up.
“Roland why you no tell me say Amaka dey come” he stared at his friend.
Roland shrugged his shoulder, slightly frowning his handsome face.
Saying nothing, he picked his phone from the centre table, after some minutes he raised his head surprised to still see me standing “You know your way around the house, why are you still standing”
Feeling stupid, I mumbled an excuse, picked my shopping bag and walked into the kitchen.
What was I expecting, I never told him I was coming over, so much for the surprise. I should have told him, maybe he had plans with his friend? Maybe he had a bad day at work. Reluctantly I pushed the thoughts away as I walked to his bedroom to change into a pair of shorts and tank top.
An hour later I dried my hands with a napkin as I headed to the parlour. I heard Roland’s voice clearly:
“She has her uses, she is a good girl, obedient, terrific cook, doesn’t ask questions, or meddle in my affairs….”
I smiled, and continued walking,
“But you don’t love her” I heard Jide’s voice clearly, my heart and legs stopped. “You are just using her the girl, free good food and free sex. Don’t let her father start fasting on your head oh” Jide said laughing.
“She is not complaining, I have tried to show her but she is blind to the signs. She is not my type, she is boring, na only missionary style she sabi. She go just lie down like wood and cover her face”
Jide laughed out loudly, I was shaking visibly “So all that ass and boobs are just for decor man”
Roland hissed, “You don’t know how frustrating it is man, watching one channel every time, is she the only omo pastor in this Lagos” he paused
“I thought they were wilder than regular girls. When I have had my fill, I know how to discharge her”
Tears I wasn’t aware of rolled down my eyes. I wish I had Uju’s courage to walk in and raise hell or just leave. I felt numb, what will Roland think. Maybe I am truly boring, as his words replayed in my head. I shut ma eyes and held back tears, took a deep breath and walked back to the kitchen and served dinner.
Time flew past as I laid down on his bed, my heartbeat became louder as I heard Jide leave and heard Roland’s footsteps closer to the room. Should I let him know I heard the discussion, what should I say? What if I ruin my chances of making him love me?
I turned to the wall as he opened the door, he walked into the bathroom and I heard water running.
I would discuss with Jessica and Uju, I decided. That is the best thing, I convinced myself. I love him, I can’t lose him now. I was lost in my thoughts when I felt a movement on the bed.
“Amaka, are you asleep?” he said in that voice that first caught my attention and later my heart.
“No” I said, opening my eyes but I couldn’t face him.
He gently touched my shoulder, turning me to face him, I stared at his chest and wondered how he could be this perfect in my eyes.
His fingers went to the buttons of my pyjamas top. I held my breath, I need to stop him. He pushed my top off my shoulder exposing my bare breasts, he flicked his hand on my nipple and I finally breathed. It came out as a sigh and thinking I was responding to his touch, he became more persistent. Push me to my back, he took off my top, he bent his head and I felt his tongue on my nipple. I raised up my hand to my face, but his words to Jide on my lack of sexual expressions and timidity I dropped them.
He then moved to my other breast and I lost all form of resistance in me. He raised up his head and found my lips, he took my hand and guided it to his erection and I jerked and withdrew my hand. He withdrew from my lips and stared at me, with a scowl on his face
“There is nothing wrong with stroking or touching it or me, thunder will not strike you from heaven. Why are you so uptight?”
I looked away feeling hurt and embarrassed.
“Fine”, he said. He reached for a condom in the drawer beside the bed. I tried to relax but my body felt stiff, he parted my legs a bit and I felt him penetrate. I held his shoulder trying to slow his pace but I was too scared to say what I felt.
His movements quickened and he was giving barely audible sighs. I drifted into my thoughts again as I closed my eyes. He doesn’t love you, you are just a sex object. His movements became faster and I winced in slight pain, I knew he was close so I endured for a moment. He gave out a loud grunt and collapsed on my body, a few seconds later he rolled away and went to the bathroom.
I turned to the wall and felt even more empty and used. I need to talk to Uju and Jessica, but I knew what they would say already and I love Roland.
Those were my last thoughts as I drifted to sleep..